Err.. Like how everyone writes birthday posts, thanks to everyone who remembered me on this special day. I really appreciate the fact that people remember my 16th year of living on Earth. After getting offline at 12.45am this morning, I went to my room and accidentally listened to some emo music which triggered the rest of my thoughts until around 2am, when I knocked out. So this is the context of my post.
Birthdays are a time of thanksgiving. I realised I have survived 16 years and the people around me have also survived 16 years of tolerating me. So thanks, God, for giving me life 16 years ago. And mom, I know you're reading this, but maybe you can direct this to dad as well. I'm not good with saying out my thoughts, but I hope this media will be better. It's quite coincidental, that my birthday is just next to Mother's Day, and sometimes colliding with it. Thanks for giving birth to me and both of you for patiently waiting for me to grow up. Oh, erm and Jean, for managing to survive with me for 15.5 years + 4 days. I know it's been hard.
Again, referring to the context of my thoughts last night, I suddenly thought about things that happened exactly 2 and 3 years ago. Xiu Juan ls and my late grandpa were both taken away by cancer. I'll start with the 2 years ago one. Xjls was in charge of the music ministry in church and she was one whom I spent a great deal of time with. She guided me spiritually and musically. She also took me out for movies and all that. Sometimes, Jean, me and a few others would meet at her office regularly for sharing etc. My 14th birthday was spent at Starbucks with her. I had no idea it would be my last with her, (adding on my great immaturity) because she had cancer a few months later and you know. Therefore, treasure everyone around you.
3 years ago, my grandpa was fighting with cancer. I wasn't exactly close to him compared to the other side of my family but this painful experience taught me to appreciate both sides. I usually didn't really care much about things he gave me, the actions he did to care for me and I think I regret it. Exactly 3 years ago, I went to visit him at the hospital. So after talking a bit to my family and other relatives, he suddenly turned to me and said, 对不起，灵颖，今天是你的生日，可是公公的生体不舒服，今年不能给你生日礼物。可以吗？I replied the obvious. It suddenly struck me. I thought about all the times when he bought me gifts and how I didn't show my appreciation. Looking at his condition, I knew I didn't have any more chances to repay him and make up for 13 years of mistakes. If you read this, don't be like me. Live so you won't regret. Though I had to go through this process of living in remorse, it taught me to start appreciating others around me. And that, is what I think was my best birthday present from him.
Since I'm at the this topic, I thought I would give a brief history of my PM (MSN personal message). Just for a reminder, it's Never give up, even when things are looking hopeless. It is a quote from the Sec 1 literature book, Boy Overboard. It's the secret of football. At that point in time, my grandfather was quite ill and everyone was quite busy because of that. There were a lot of things I had to overcome. His condition worsened all the way. My mom was busy bringing him in and out from chemotherapy and everyone was quite tired from taking care of a terminally ill relative. Apart from worrying about his condition, I had a violin exam to worry about as well as EOYs. It didn't help much when he finally passed away a few days before the start of the exams. That's when I suddenly took interest in the quote. Everything seemed crashing down at the same time, but somehow I managed to tide over it. And that's why till today, the PM still stands.
No comments:
Post a Comment